Hope Lives Forward

"I can feel the cry for glory of my generation rising as we run the race of perseverance, a trait we learned while on the backs of the generations before. They paid their price for us, but before we walk from present to future glory, we must pay our own price. We must pay that price not only for the sake of ourselves, but for the sake of the generations to come."  -Christine Caine

For a couple of weeks now, I've had this anxious feeling building inside me. It's not the kind that crippled me in my youth. It's not a fearful anxiety, but one of excitement & hope. At times it has been lulled by apathy, but the deeper I dig into God's heart I am finding myself becoming more awake to this same cry Christine speaks of. and well, if I write it down, if I say it enough, if I kneel before the throne with my eyes, heart, & hands - then who is the enemy to stand in my way?

All of my life, I have had this gift of wonder. I see life in a way that extracts the beauty from every moment. I see him in music. I feel him in the earth. I am taken back by the reflection of Him in people [especially children]. I am wide-eyed and mystified by the majesty of the King.

I remember being a child that was her own person, wild and free. No person could change me, stubborn as I was. There was always this sense of wonderment that accompanied my wild adventures. I did whatever I could to create, to experience, to feel the rush of life in my soul. With my eyes fixed on Jesus it was like magic, but when I was fixed on the mirror I saw emptiness, which caused me to try and replicate the substance of God himself. We all know where that road leads.

Though at times this gift has caused me to feel the very brokenness of man, I believe God has given me the gift of wonder to remind me I cannot create it or replicate it, but if I would worship Him from a place of wonder - I would be an immovable force for the kingdom.

In the ordinary every day of college life, it feels like the art of changing is a fallacy. I cannot change myself nor can I change people around me. So how can I change a generation? How can I bring this kingdom glory to such a broken place? What Jesus has been telling me is that I can't do it alone. I need Him.

The more I seek God, the more I am finding Him. and boy what wonder I feel in this next season that God has laid out for us. It feels a lot like the weeks leading up to my internship with Choose to Invest this time last year. People would ask, "how are you feeling? are you ready?" and I would tell them honestly, "I am terrified, but I am equally [if not more so] exhilarated by the future glory that awaits me in my next journey." Without the fear now, I am hopeful, expectant, exhilarated by what He has planned.

Sure it is unknown, but aren't all great adventures experienced without a map? In the winter season, there is space for us to see clearly. God has given us an opportunity to join Him. He has given us an opportunity to be front row on this incredible redemption story He has for this earth [with an ending we already know!].

So for this season, for this year, I want to live in wonder. I want to worship from freedom. I am choosing the adventure without a map and I am living with hope for the future. I want to feel the rush of glory He has. and I want the generation below me to experience it too.

Let us rise and take our place in the Kingdom, friends. It's time we start dreaming again. God's got some glory waiting for us.

Em