"I will lift my eyes unto the hills.
Where does my help come from?
Surely it comes from the Lord."
It's easy to say that you trust in the lord these days. But sometimes I wonder if you say that just for others to hear you, or if you truly trust in Him. I also know it is easy to put your trust in other things. In this privileged country of ours, it is so simple to put your trust in money and in all the other things that clutter the soul. I don't know about you, but I cannot keep putting my trust in these things anymore. There has got to be a point in life where you are so desperate that you fall to your knees and cry out to Him. This point is sometimes known as rock-bottom. Maybe this means the stigma on hitting rock-bottom is deceiving. Clearly, this is a good thing. Being brought to your knees and giving up control is the point at which you fully learn to trust in Him. I can say that I have only had this once. I can say that I know what it's like, but that does not mean these words transfer to your own heart. No. It must be experienced.
I read once in a book, "If you want to learn to pray, go to Africa." So I went to Africa. and yes, I learned to pray. but not the silly half-hearted mumbles we readily say in sunday school just to get out on time. No. I'm talkin' deep and powerful prayer. Prayer that you feel in your bones. As I stood in Cheryl's home, I prayed like never before. I cried out with joy and I could feel God's love coursing through my veins. And since my return, the lord has given me the desire to feel this again and to help others feel this. Now, I am consumed with those desires and longings to share God's love.
But with desire comes discomfort, uncertainty, confusion, and an aching pain in your heart. This is where God meets me today. As I try and figure out what it is that I am supposed to do with my life, He continues to push these desires unto my heart. and continually, I am reminded that whatever his plan, it will be for the good. Don't get me wrong, the not-knowing kills me. I can't stand to think that I am clueless in my own life. Normal people would tell me that I need to get my life together and make a plan. But slowly, I am learning this is God's way of teaching me to trust him. To stop making plans, and to say yes to whatever he has in mind.
Senior year is quickly approaching, and this is usually when everyone expects you to have a plan for your life. but when they ask me what my plans are and I say I'm not sure yet and they give a look of disproval, I will recite my favorite lines of the gospel: "I will lift mine eyes unto the hills. where does my help come from? surely, it comes from the Lord." He has a plan for me. I can feel it in my bones. I feel it coursing through my veins. and no matter where it takes me I will lift my eyes because my help surely comes from the Lord.
Hallelujah. Amen.
-em
I read once in a book, "If you want to learn to pray, go to Africa." So I went to Africa. and yes, I learned to pray. but not the silly half-hearted mumbles we readily say in sunday school just to get out on time. No. I'm talkin' deep and powerful prayer. Prayer that you feel in your bones. As I stood in Cheryl's home, I prayed like never before. I cried out with joy and I could feel God's love coursing through my veins. And since my return, the lord has given me the desire to feel this again and to help others feel this. Now, I am consumed with those desires and longings to share God's love.
But with desire comes discomfort, uncertainty, confusion, and an aching pain in your heart. This is where God meets me today. As I try and figure out what it is that I am supposed to do with my life, He continues to push these desires unto my heart. and continually, I am reminded that whatever his plan, it will be for the good. Don't get me wrong, the not-knowing kills me. I can't stand to think that I am clueless in my own life. Normal people would tell me that I need to get my life together and make a plan. But slowly, I am learning this is God's way of teaching me to trust him. To stop making plans, and to say yes to whatever he has in mind.
Senior year is quickly approaching, and this is usually when everyone expects you to have a plan for your life. but when they ask me what my plans are and I say I'm not sure yet and they give a look of disproval, I will recite my favorite lines of the gospel: "I will lift mine eyes unto the hills. where does my help come from? surely, it comes from the Lord." He has a plan for me. I can feel it in my bones. I feel it coursing through my veins. and no matter where it takes me I will lift my eyes because my help surely comes from the Lord.
Hallelujah. Amen.
-em
This is awesome... you're completely right. Sometimes I wonder if people would ever even experience the climaxes in life until they had completely surrendered everything... literally every thing, every problem, care, time, mind, heart, relationships... because we carry such heavy burdens and it weighs us down so much... and until we have completely given it to him we'll continue to carry it and get so clouded up. Complete and total freedom IS laying it all down, no matter what it is, and being able to experience the fullness of his love after doing that. Thank you for sharing this. It's blessed me. :)
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