It's funny how I see my grandfather everywhere I go. I wonder to myself if he would chuckle at that funny thing or if he would make the same face that I do when I don't know something. I think on what he would be doing right this minute and what we would do together if he were still here. Since he passed, I have become attuned to a new rhythm that demands leaving space for the broken, the grief, the sad, and makes way to the happy & the thankful. It is a heartbeat for the new season. A call on top of a mountain that begs for an echo. I've found my voice & it bellows over the rolling hills. Deep calling unto deep.
These moments of clear loss - where I feel my heart tugging like a dog on a leash. "Please don't go there. Take me this way instead. It hurts less," my heart whispers. It is sometimes difficult to let myself dwell there. To feel the pain as it is. But I know that it is leading me into healing. So for today, let's sit here and see what Jesus does.
Do you ever feel like the hand you've been dealt isn't fair? You can't, for one second, understand why something happened or is happening. You may also know that it's "a part of life," but you still wish that it wasn't you who had to go through it? me too. I still have flashes to a hospital room & how each second felt like eternity. Even 5 months later, these are places in my heart that I do not want to venture to.
If there's one thing that I feel more strongly about than how much this pain hurts, it is that God knows. Not only does He know, but He understands. Oh does he understand the ache of our hearts in these times. He sees those moments of clear loss. He knows the feeling of pain. and I know that He sits so close in those moments holding us like never before.
We have to open the doors to these places. We have to venture in. We have to sift through the stuff. I know it hurts but He's healing us. Each time that we go, Jesus meets us there. He has given each star a name. He has promised to heal our broken hearts. and He understands like no one else how unfair it all is.
The question now is this:
Will you sit with Him and let Him heal those broken pieces?
He's waiting to hold you, love. go on. let Him in.
Em
These moments of clear loss - where I feel my heart tugging like a dog on a leash. "Please don't go there. Take me this way instead. It hurts less," my heart whispers. It is sometimes difficult to let myself dwell there. To feel the pain as it is. But I know that it is leading me into healing. So for today, let's sit here and see what Jesus does.
Jesus, will you sit with us in the things that hurt. will you come like rain to wash it all away. would you bring joy in the midst of mourning. we know this isn't a quick fix with a bandaid, but a slow and steady healing. one that will make us whole. let us not grow weary & lose heart in the process. strengthen us & help us as we lean into you.
Do you ever feel like the hand you've been dealt isn't fair? You can't, for one second, understand why something happened or is happening. You may also know that it's "a part of life," but you still wish that it wasn't you who had to go through it? me too. I still have flashes to a hospital room & how each second felt like eternity. Even 5 months later, these are places in my heart that I do not want to venture to.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars; He gives to all of them their names. Great is our Lord, and abundant in power, His understanding is beyond measure. Psalm 147:3-5
If there's one thing that I feel more strongly about than how much this pain hurts, it is that God knows. Not only does He know, but He understands. Oh does he understand the ache of our hearts in these times. He sees those moments of clear loss. He knows the feeling of pain. and I know that He sits so close in those moments holding us like never before.
We have to open the doors to these places. We have to venture in. We have to sift through the stuff. I know it hurts but He's healing us. Each time that we go, Jesus meets us there. He has given each star a name. He has promised to heal our broken hearts. and He understands like no one else how unfair it all is.
The question now is this:
Will you sit with Him and let Him heal those broken pieces?
He's waiting to hold you, love. go on. let Him in.
Em
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